Monday, October 24, 2011

When love makes you do crazy things


The Ballad of Genesis and Lady Jaye // Trailer from Marie Losier on Vimeo.


Oh I find this extremely fascinating. This is merely an extreme version of taking up a hobby for your boo, learning to love the things they love – it’s all essentially an effort to meld together.

I have this idea of love being this magnetism of self-improvement, where each spends a lifetime pulling, pushing, and urging the other to greatness. That is, if you find someone good. The negative is also possible, if you don’t see it.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Please stop humiliating your pets



I don't know if this dog could have given a bigger cry for help if he was found passed out with an empty bottle of xanax.
When the animal revolution comes, I want them to know that I was a sympathizer.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Semi-useless talent: How to draw a panda

I like to leave pictures of animals on post-it notes for my work best friend, emilycat. Thusly, I tried to learn how to draw a panda. 

Doing it right: 

Doing it wrong:
My homicidal pandas.

Nothing is as easy as it looks online :(

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

What I'm obsessed with right now: The death of a gangster

via nymag.com
I've been known to watch this show and start chanting (a la Wu Tang) "Gustavo Fring ain't nothin to fuck wit!"

Giancarlo Esposito is the reason I started to watch (and subsequently became OBSESSED with) Breaking Bad. The storyline is a fantastical mix of reality and absurdity, believable craziness that leaves me yelling at the end of each episode "what the fuck!?! That was crazy!"

 I've been let down by other TV show loves before, but Breaking Bad hasn't led me astray, even through the 4-TV-seasons-in-three-months bender I recently had to undertake to get caught up with the drama. If you have 2,162 hours to spare (and believe me, you do), I strongly recommend injecting all 46 episodes into your eyeballs. It's an addiction well worth the trouble.

Though I am sad, SAD, to see my favorite character go down, there could not have been a more thuggish ruggish way to go. RIP Gustavo Fring!

Friday, October 7, 2011

Nobody wants your mom jeans



LOLZ.

Though I have to say, I can't stand that actress who plays the daughter. She was really obnoxious in that Toyota Venza commercial (which again featured her being somewhat of an asshole daughter). What's with her and the parentals anyway?

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Eat it: Portabella Mushroom Bake

Sorry if this picture isn't sexy enough for you. I promise, this is good food.

Here it is - my first recipe post! *cue drums* dun-dun-dun-dun-dun fanfarefanfarefanfarefanfare!

Get excited people. You will enjoy this. 

What you should know - this vegetarian! Nay, vegan even. But do not be intimidated, dear meat eaters. Herein lies juicy deliciousness, of which I've confirmed with both vegetarian apologetics and non-believers. All have extolled the tasty flavorfulness of the portabella mushroom bake. Turtle asks me to make this dish like once a week!

Still not convinced? I hesitate to describe this dish as something you may already know, because I believe the biggest setup in eating a vegetarian dish is comparing it to meat. Manage your expectations kid, seitan and tofu ain't no type of meat, so don't play yourself.

HOWEVER! I would say that this dish has a "meaty essence." I used to eat beef (before Oprah sunk that industry), and this, in very very tiny ways (again, manage your expectations!) reminds me of steak. 

And it's super easy :-D Surely you are sold by now. 

The Portabella Mushroom Bake is a recipe adapted from a random webpage full of vegetarian and vegan recipes. Really, it's called Random Vegan Recipes. No, I myself am not one, but every now and again I venture into the neighborhood and am rarely disappointed.

I've made some alterations, and also halved this recipe, since I know this is your first time and maybe you just want to try it out for two instead of committing to 4, right? 

Here's what you will need:

1/4 cup almond meal/flour
2 tbsp. olive oil 
2 tbsp. Braggs Liquid Amino Acids* 
2tbsp. water 
1 tbsp balsamic vinegar
1 and 1/2 chopped garlic 
1/2 tsp dried rosemary 
1/2 tsp dried oregano 
2 large portabella mushrooms, stems removed

*Don't be intimidated by this crazy name! It's basically a healthier type of soy sauce, ok? You can put it on everything, and it will make it better. Also, this ingredient, combined with the balsamic vinegar, basically makes the dish, so you can skimp elsewhere (like the herbs), but don't shortcut here. 

So first, clean the portabella mushroom, and remove the stem. Usually I just rinse these bad boys in cold water, and leave in the "gills." Take care to keep the "lip" intact - this will contain the delicious sauce. The portabellas will feel a little slimy after washing, so to dry, simply wrap them in a paper towel (you might see a brown residue, but I think that's just mushroom essence or something? You'll live.). Make sure they're fresh! If not, they get a little chewy after cooking. Not cool.


Next, mix together all the remaining ingredients in a small bowl. That's right, throw everything in that bowl - almond flour, olive oil, Braggs, water, balsamic vinegar, garlic, rosemary and oregano. A quick note on rosemary - if you buy it dried, those little leaves can be kind of pointy and crunchy. Take some time to smush them a little finer if you can. 
  




Now to the easiest step: Pour that shizz into your mushrooms, bake at 350 for about 20-25 minutes. 




Here's what it should look like after baked.


Finally, eat it all, lick your plate clean, and reconsider your stance on vegan food.

Fin.

One more 'gin, with less feeling.

Ingredients:

1/4 cup almond meal/flour
2 tbsp. olive oil 
2 tbsp. Braggs Liquid Amino Acids* 
2tbsp. water 
1 tbsp balsamic vinegar
1 and 1/2 chopped garlic 
1/2 tsp dried rosemary 
1/2 tsp dried oregano 
2 large portabella mushrooms, stems removed

Instructions:

1. Preheat oven to 350.
2. In a small bowl, mix together almond flour, oil, Braggs, water, vinegar, garlic, rosemary and oregano and blend until well combined.
3. In a large baking dish, place the mushrooms upside down. Pour sauce over and bake for 20 - 25 minutes.

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