Friday, April 26, 2013

Current Obsession: Fantasizing About Summer With This





over and over and over again, dreaming about summer in BK... c'mon motherfucker.

And obsessing about launching my kickstarter page. with a video. my world is changing. 

Monday, April 15, 2013

Romantic gestures of The internet age

texting gifs
emojis
forwarding relevant emails
the dedicated facebook post
linking profiles
sharing your password

Friday, April 12, 2013

The Weekly Gifts From The Internet

Dear Ya'll,

Based God Internet was very generous this week, blessing us with so many delightful things like:


'Roided ferrets being sold as poodles. This is beyond generous, based god internet. I can stare at this picture infinitely and see the very soul of life, where one would repurpose an animal as worthless as a ferret (yea, I said it), into something passable like hulk mad poodle. Honestly, I want a 'roided ferret so bad now.



Calming manatees. Of course. OF COURSE.



A cat in a sock? Why yes, that sounds lovely.



Someone made an online directory of all the gif reactions you could ever imagine. HYFR!

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

In Which I Take a Moment For @Iamdiddy...



Ya'll. Perhaps you have gotten hints of it before, in casual conversation, in written posts, in ghost tweets, and long hazy diatribes, but allow me to make a formal motherfucking statement: I fucking love P.Diddy (or Diddy, or Sean Combs, or Puffy... whoever the fuck he is this month).

He is what I like to call one of the coachroaches of hip hop, an esteemed club of artists who, no matter what the situation or occassion, WILL NEVER EVER GO AWAY.

He is the king of reinvention, a genius at manipulating the media, inserting himself into whatever is "hot now," always elevating his personal brand to remind you that HIS TALENTS ARE NOT TO BE TOUCHED NOR RIVALED.

I wouldn't trust him with my career AT ALL, but I have to say, I respect his hustle spirit.
Like how the fuck did he insert himself into a Brittney Spears remix? How I ask you. HOW???

All he did was yell and make sure there was good product placement.

But he's a crafty motherfucker. And I respect that.

AND HE'S "DATING" KATE UPTON NOW.  Talk about a pop culture fame troll, way to bait 'em Dids!

I'm not even going to be ashamed to say it: I fucking love his music. I stan for Danity Kane, Press Play was a solid album, and Diddy Dirty Money's album is STILL IN ROTATION for me. Solid from start to finish.

No, I wouldn't work for him, and I doubt I'd even want to meet him, but I SEE YOU P.DIDDY. And I like what I see.

Fin.

[Note: We need to have a longer convo about B. Spears. But my brain just cannot compute her anymore. Shadow dancer of her former self. Also:
1. WTF Waka? WTF. Your verse was trash (not that anyone was really trying here, but you ruined what could have been an adequate club song.
2. Is Lil' Wayne growing bangs? ]

Friday, April 5, 2013

WAAAAAAAY Overdue For This





SQUIRREL POST! SQUIRREL POST! SQUIRRELLLLLLLL POOOOOOOOSSSSTT!

My three favorite things (miniatures, squirrels, and anthropomorphization) lobbed into one photoshoot??

YES. PLEASE. MOAR.

[Ed Note: Don't ya'll love how incredibly alluring my headlines are these days?? And are you ever slightly disappointed when it's not what you thought it was going to be?? Yes, welcome to my 9 to 5, where I write headlines nearly EVERY DAMN DAY. You're welcome!]

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Annoying But Probably True



The only times that I'm super cranky and will not apologize for it:
1. Hungry
2. Sleepy
3. Cold

I've been known to love on the snooze button periodically throughout my life. Now I know he's a shitty lover who only causes more harm than good. So long fucker.

Monday, April 1, 2013

An Important Moment in Pop Culture History



I've been haunted by a Debarge song I heard in a coffee shop (why a coffee shop was playing 80s pop is beyond me), and in an internet search I came across this little gem. Let us reflect on the:

hairspray
excessive satin
long blazers
the kid with the video camera

And the general sitcom awesomeness of a pop star magically appearing in the life of some "average people" and recording music with them (hello Stevie Wonder). It was probably a big deal to have Debarge on Facts of Life, and it was probably a career highlight for him. Those were the days.

(And no, this isn't a April fools joke, I have had a Debarge song in my head for over a week)

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